So, it's been a while, and I know you all just love reading about my life (or lack thereof) which is why I am posting now. Just kidding, you're probably really bored which is the only reason you would want to read this. Because who would honestly read a personal blog for fun. I wouldn't (and don't)! Anyway, guess I'll get started with the actual entry.
I realized I failed to update you on a lot. Particularly the last month or so of school. So, briefly, I'll describe it. Really just two events, but still big things nonetheless.
So, the first of which is Prom, and it was a lot of fun! Jacob and I went together and that really jump-started our relationship together. I felt that we connected on levels we hadn't until that night. We had a lot of fun, not so much dancing, but doing all the other prom-y things. We went out to dinner with two other couples, just to Olive Garden (where I found out he wasn't a big fan of Italian...). After that Jacob and I split away from the group and went to his house for some pictures and to meet his parents, who were our escorts. It seems like that would be awkward, but I was grateful for it. It allowed Jacob and I to cuddle, and we were both pretty wore out after the night was over because Jacob had just barely got his voice back from Mono and a throat infection, and I was just getting over Mono myself. All in all, I'm really grateful they drove us. Afterward we went to both our houses, changed, and went to a bonfire. We were there until around 4 in the morning and just sat around, talked with friends, and enjoyed the night. So prom was fun.
The other thing is graduation. The last week of school, we only had graduation practice, and didn't have to go to any classes. My parents came into town (which I was really excited for) that week, and so it was overall just a good experience. Graduation was fun, walking across the stage was really great, I couldn't hear anything outside my name, and my beating heart. It was all a bunch of white noise. Our school had fireworks and then Jacob and I went to the Senior All Night Party (my first time pulling an all nighter). The All-Night party was all right. It was at a bowling alley/arcade and got really old really fast. We couldn't leave early either so we were just stuck there. But oh well. We still had fun. While my parents were in town, we signed a lease on an apartment, and that was really about all we did that is super noteable anyway.
I want to talk about the relationship with me and Jacob here, but I'd have to go back and fourth a lot, so I'll save that....
Moving along, we enter the summer months. In June, I was really stressing, I was supposed to move into an Apartment July fifth and I still didn't have a job. I was putting in 3 applications minimum every day and creating a list of companies that I had applied to so I could call in and see what the deal was with my application. In my desperation for a job, I applied for a place called Racetrac, a gas station, and got a call back for an interview. Initially I was really nervous because the location they wanted me to work at was really sketchy, and my mom kept telling me to just go to the interview and see where they would have me work. I really considered not going and just telling her that I went because of how nervous I was. But I went because my gut said I really should go, and it ended up going really, really well. The guy that was interviewing me at first told me that he would call me back if I got the job or not, but by the end of the interview he told me that I was hired. AND it wasn't in a sketchy location. Even better was the fact that I wasn't going to be making minimum wage. Needless to say, I took the job. I started the last week of June at a training location and then moved into my home store the first week of July, which was also the week I moved into my apartment.
My apartment move was anything but smooth. When I first got into it, there were carpet stains, crayon all over the walls and it wasn't clean. At all. My leasing agent came in and told me that they hadn't done a walk through or cleaned it and asked if I could delay my move in. Which I told them I couldn't because my parents were driving here from Utah with all my stuff. Needless to say, they got right on it and all seemed to be going fine. The only other hiccup was with my internet. My order got mixed up and I wasn't able to have internet the first week I moved in, which really sucked because I also started a summer college class and it was all online. After my internet was all installed, things went a lot better for me.
I went to Quakecon in the middle of July and holy wow... it was the most fun I've had in a very long time. Quakecon is a HUGE gaming event with a giant LAN party where everyone brought their computers to game on, they had game releases, and booths and raffles... for me it was like being a five year old in a toy store. There were so many awesome computers, and I just had a lot of fun gaming and being with my friends. Jacob and I ended up being in a room together (with 2 other guys) at the hotel so that was a pretty good benefit too. ;)
And then August was just a usual grind for me. Working, schooling, and trying to figure out my new life. I really have anything to say about August honestly. So I won't.
And now for what I was going to say about Jacob and I. So we decided to make it official on April first (go figure, but I'm being serious. It's not an April Fools) which was the day we had our first kiss. We spent almost every day of the summer together doing anything and everything we could together. We ran errands with each other, we went to random places together, swam together, ate together... and it was so great. I really hope that I stay with him for a very long time because I have never met anyone so perfect for me before him. And now that college started, I hardly see him anymore.
After such a good summer of being together and now being separated it's really been hard for me. I have been having troubles sleeping at night, I've developed anxiety, and overall it's just taking a toll. Our communication has gone down the drain, as if never seeing him wasn't enough. Recently he's made friends with a lot of girls and I've had a lot of issues with jealousy, trusting him to know what is right and what is wrong, and feeling like I've been replaced. I've been working on it, but I feel like those are all just natural reactions that a girl has when they essentially lose someone they were so close to. This conversion to a long distance relationship has been really hard and I only hope that it will get easier.
College is all right too. I enjoy all my classes and professors, particularly my government and history classes, but it is still just school for me. I haven't really made any friends which really sucks, but I'm working on that as well. The school itself is all right, I just wish that I knew more people. My anxiety there is killer. But I get through it.
I've also been stressing out because recently at work we went through a large change in which our scheduling was handled. Instead of the stores handling their own schedules, corporate is taking over. I had planned on getting 27-30 hours a week and now I'm making 23. Four hours does not seem like a big loss to a lot of people, but when you are a broke college kid with bills, it can be the difference between eating that night and not. It can be the difference in having enough gas to make it to school or not. And not a lot of my friends understand that because their parents are all either paying for every part of their college education, or for their living arrangements. Luckily I don't have to pay rent, but I'm really nervous to see what my check is going to look like with these 23 hours. Only time will tell what it will be like.
Anyway. That's all I really have to say for now, so I hope you made it to the end. Oliver (my cat I recently got) has been trying to type messages which I have deleted. But he and I both give you all best wishes in your road of life too.
Sincerely,
Alyssa
(And Oliver the kitten)
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